From one of my favorite people, Ms. E.
This is her response when I asked her if it was normal to feel nervous, anxious and doubtful about buying a house...
"Even still, I had my moments of doubt, moments when I wondered whether I was making the right decision. But the reality is this...if you can afford the place you're buying, and like the place you're buying (love will probably be reserved for a home that comes later down the line), then it's a good decision. You're offically begining to invest in yourself and your future and that is a beautiful thing. In the words of Martin Scorsese..."you won't get anywhere in life if you don't make a decision"...and YOU my dear have a made a choice which will propel you forward in life. Don't stress out, embrace the newness, and know that everything will be just fine :)"
Thanks E! I love how you always speak honestly and lovingly.
I really appreciate you.
Life is GRAND!
Super Panda
Monday, December 22, 2008
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
It's a Tough Holiday Season
It's an unspoken rule in my family that we don't talk about emotions. Which is why I'm blogging about something that is near and dear to me.
It's the Holiday Season and I am having the hardest time being jolly.
There are so many wonderful things happening- which I am EXTREMELY GRATEFUL for- such as a new house, and the hubby so close to being with LA City. Yet, I can't help but feel
d
o
w
n
and sad, and heart broken because my one wish this Christmas will not come true. And no, I'm not being negative, I'm being real. All I want for Christmas is to have my dad back. Not the dad I lost when I was a kid because we lived apart, but the dad I got to know while he was on his deathbed. And as an adult, I want to just scream and throw a fit and cry my eyes out, because I am grieving this loss that is so deep, that I cannot pull myself out. I cry for what I lost and can never get back. I cry for what could have been had I known certain things while he was alive. I cry because I miss him. I cry for all the things I missed out on as a child. I cry because I know that no matter how angry I was at him, he loved me unconditionally. I cry because the holidays make me miss him so much more. I cry because it is almost a year since he died, and for some reason, the one year mark makes it seem more final.
I am so tired and weary. I am sick of hearing people dismiss my emotions of sadness and grief. It is a valid emotion- even with all the blessings that have been bestowed upon me. This is a part of my life- a HUGE one at that, and I simply cannot put it down and be on my merry way. While I understand that my grief has lasted so much longer than a lot of people's sympathies, it is still unfair to dismiss how I am currently feeling. It's a valid emotion, and really, come to think of it, all I want for Christmas is for people to say, IT'S OK. It's ok to feel the way I feel. It's ok to still be sad. It's ok to be grateful and happy and sad and grieving all at the same time. It's ok to miss my dad. These are all real emotions to me, and should not be cut down, or made any less important simply because of all the other things that are going on. If anything, it makes me miss my dad more because I wish he was around for me to share all these wonderful things with. I know he would have been really happy and extremely proud of me. And I know that somewhere, he is. I just wish I could hear him say it.
Please be kind and gentle to others. You never know what burden they are carrying on their shoulders.
Life is GRAND!
Super Panda
It's the Holiday Season and I am having the hardest time being jolly.
There are so many wonderful things happening- which I am EXTREMELY GRATEFUL for- such as a new house, and the hubby so close to being with LA City. Yet, I can't help but feel
d
o
w
n
and sad, and heart broken because my one wish this Christmas will not come true. And no, I'm not being negative, I'm being real. All I want for Christmas is to have my dad back. Not the dad I lost when I was a kid because we lived apart, but the dad I got to know while he was on his deathbed. And as an adult, I want to just scream and throw a fit and cry my eyes out, because I am grieving this loss that is so deep, that I cannot pull myself out. I cry for what I lost and can never get back. I cry for what could have been had I known certain things while he was alive. I cry because I miss him. I cry for all the things I missed out on as a child. I cry because I know that no matter how angry I was at him, he loved me unconditionally. I cry because the holidays make me miss him so much more. I cry because it is almost a year since he died, and for some reason, the one year mark makes it seem more final.
I am so tired and weary. I am sick of hearing people dismiss my emotions of sadness and grief. It is a valid emotion- even with all the blessings that have been bestowed upon me. This is a part of my life- a HUGE one at that, and I simply cannot put it down and be on my merry way. While I understand that my grief has lasted so much longer than a lot of people's sympathies, it is still unfair to dismiss how I am currently feeling. It's a valid emotion, and really, come to think of it, all I want for Christmas is for people to say, IT'S OK. It's ok to feel the way I feel. It's ok to still be sad. It's ok to be grateful and happy and sad and grieving all at the same time. It's ok to miss my dad. These are all real emotions to me, and should not be cut down, or made any less important simply because of all the other things that are going on. If anything, it makes me miss my dad more because I wish he was around for me to share all these wonderful things with. I know he would have been really happy and extremely proud of me. And I know that somewhere, he is. I just wish I could hear him say it.
Please be kind and gentle to others. You never know what burden they are carrying on their shoulders.
Life is GRAND!
Super Panda
Friday, December 12, 2008
Quick Friday Update
I've been swamped at work. What else is new?
*The more papers we sign regarding the house, the closer I feel we are to owning it.
Cross your fingers that things continue to go smoothly. If they do, we should have a new house in the new year. YAY!
*Tomorrow is Fillmore Fire Department's Christmas Party.
Of course, the hubby and I will be there.
*Sunday is our annual Christmas brunch so we'll have a few friends over. We will also be heading to the Fillmore Fire Department Toy Drive at night.
*I am making 300+ red velvet truffles this weekend- some for the Christmas brunch, but most are for Christmas gifts for the hubby's captains.
Life is GRAND!
Super Panda
*The more papers we sign regarding the house, the closer I feel we are to owning it.
Cross your fingers that things continue to go smoothly. If they do, we should have a new house in the new year. YAY!
*Tomorrow is Fillmore Fire Department's Christmas Party.
Of course, the hubby and I will be there.
*Sunday is our annual Christmas brunch so we'll have a few friends over. We will also be heading to the Fillmore Fire Department Toy Drive at night.
*I am making 300+ red velvet truffles this weekend- some for the Christmas brunch, but most are for Christmas gifts for the hubby's captains.
Life is GRAND!
Super Panda
Monday, December 8, 2008
Manny Pacquiao DOMINATES Oscar de la Hoya
and of coures, Filipinos all over the world are celebrating!
Life is GRAND!
Super Panda
Life is GRAND!
Super Panda
Friday, December 5, 2008
Hip hip hooray!
This post is dedicated to my husband...
Congrats Milo!
Milo is on to the next phase with LA City! He got his temp hire until he passes his medical exam on December 12th. After that, we'll just be waiting for his academy date!
Hip Hip Hooray!
I love you! I'm so incredibly proud of you! Your dreams are coming true- I know you've worked very hard for this and deserve all the glory that comes with it.
5 years ago all this was merely a dream- you never gave up no matter how long it took you to get to this point. The boys and I are behind you all the way.
Love- your #1 fans,
Super Panda, Jamba and Cash
Life is GRAND!
Congrats Milo!
Milo is on to the next phase with LA City! He got his temp hire until he passes his medical exam on December 12th. After that, we'll just be waiting for his academy date!
Hip Hip Hooray!
I love you! I'm so incredibly proud of you! Your dreams are coming true- I know you've worked very hard for this and deserve all the glory that comes with it.
5 years ago all this was merely a dream- you never gave up no matter how long it took you to get to this point. The boys and I are behind you all the way.
Love- your #1 fans,
Super Panda, Jamba and Cash
Life is GRAND!
Back from Cabo!
We came back Tuesday, the 2nd. Things have been a whirlwind since then!
While we were in Cabo- we found out that our offer on a house was accepted and we needed to start escrow. However, since we were out of town, it needed to be pushed back a few days. We started escrow Wednesday night, and now here we are in the midst of buying a house during the holidays. We're def going nuts!
Ok here are pics from Cabo... pardon the lack of commentary. I just wanted to get pics posted.
Friday night... Milo and I took a walk on the beach
Saturday, we slept in, had breakfast and decided to go to the marina to do some shopping. We also attended a Mexican fiesta at our hotel...
Speaking of our hotel- everyone there was incredibly nice and friendly. LOVED it!
Everything was included- all the alcohol, etc.
We even had a free minibar in our room- complete with hard liquor and sodas, beer, etc.
One night, after walking around, we found a bottle of champagne with 2 glasses that said "Congratulations on your wedding!" We told them we were honeymooners. We were, kind of.
Ok, on to the next day- Sunday... We scheduled a snorkeling trip to Lover's Beach. Awesome weather- not a lot of waves. Def one of my favorite days. On our way to the marina, the guy that picked us up also took us on a little tour. Def awesome!
Monday- we went swimming with the dolphins. We don't have any pictures because you weren't allowed to bring a camera. Instead, they took pictures for you and then charged you a ridiculous amount. We bought 1 6x8 print for $25. We met Cory and Allison while waiting for the dolphin thing to begin. They were waiting too- and were staying at our hotel. We then planned to meet up with them at our hotel that evening during one of the night's shows- Grease. The entertainment group performed a few dances. They were phenomenal- no lie!
And that was our last night in Cabo. We bid adieu to our friends and went to our room to pack and sleep. The following day, Tuesday- we woke up, had breakfast, then went to the beach where I laid out and tanned and Milo swam. We then headed back to our hotel after an hour to shower and get ready for our trip home.
We got picked up from the airport by his dad, and from then on, our lives have been about this house we're buying.
Definitely fun times. I loved every minute of being on vacation with my husband.
He's my best friend and I really enjoyed being with him uninterrupted for those few days- especially since I barely saw him this summer.
Life is GRAND!
Super Panda
While we were in Cabo- we found out that our offer on a house was accepted and we needed to start escrow. However, since we were out of town, it needed to be pushed back a few days. We started escrow Wednesday night, and now here we are in the midst of buying a house during the holidays. We're def going nuts!
Ok here are pics from Cabo... pardon the lack of commentary. I just wanted to get pics posted.
Friday night... Milo and I took a walk on the beach
Saturday, we slept in, had breakfast and decided to go to the marina to do some shopping. We also attended a Mexican fiesta at our hotel...
Speaking of our hotel- everyone there was incredibly nice and friendly. LOVED it!
Everything was included- all the alcohol, etc.
We even had a free minibar in our room- complete with hard liquor and sodas, beer, etc.
One night, after walking around, we found a bottle of champagne with 2 glasses that said "Congratulations on your wedding!" We told them we were honeymooners. We were, kind of.
Ok, on to the next day- Sunday... We scheduled a snorkeling trip to Lover's Beach. Awesome weather- not a lot of waves. Def one of my favorite days. On our way to the marina, the guy that picked us up also took us on a little tour. Def awesome!
Monday- we went swimming with the dolphins. We don't have any pictures because you weren't allowed to bring a camera. Instead, they took pictures for you and then charged you a ridiculous amount. We bought 1 6x8 print for $25. We met Cory and Allison while waiting for the dolphin thing to begin. They were waiting too- and were staying at our hotel. We then planned to meet up with them at our hotel that evening during one of the night's shows- Grease. The entertainment group performed a few dances. They were phenomenal- no lie!
And that was our last night in Cabo. We bid adieu to our friends and went to our room to pack and sleep. The following day, Tuesday- we woke up, had breakfast, then went to the beach where I laid out and tanned and Milo swam. We then headed back to our hotel after an hour to shower and get ready for our trip home.
We got picked up from the airport by his dad, and from then on, our lives have been about this house we're buying.
Definitely fun times. I loved every minute of being on vacation with my husband.
He's my best friend and I really enjoyed being with him uninterrupted for those few days- especially since I barely saw him this summer.
Life is GRAND!
Super Panda
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Happy Birthday Dad!
"What though the radiance which was once so bright
Be now for ever taken from my sight,
Though nothing can bring back the hour
Of splendour in the grass, of glory in the flower;
We will grieve not, rather find
Strength in what remains behind"
-William Wordsworth "Ode: Intimations of Immortality from Recollections of Early Childhood"
Life is GRAND- although I miss my dad terribly.
Super Panda
Monday, November 24, 2008
MEEN Girl's Day at Disneyland
So, yesterday, the gals and I headed down to Anaheim!
We started off at California Adventure
It's a Bug's Life!
Our weird hologram pic
Erika- which character are you?
I was Jane from Tarzan. Megan was Belle from Beauty and the Beast, Nicole was Dot from A Bug's Life, and Emila was Nala from The Lion King!
After California Adventure, we then headed over to Disneyland.
Our first ride was Pirates of the Caribbean and then we were off to Splash Mountain in Critter Country!
Zip A Dee Do Dah, Zip A Dee Yay
After this ride, we then went to the Haunted Mansion where we had fastpasses.
After the Haunted Mansion, we then tried our luck at Indiana Jones... too long of a wait so we didn't get on it. So we ventured over to Tomorrowland and went on the Finding Nemo ride. After that, we went to Space Mountain.
After the ride, guess who we found!
After seeing Minnie and Mickey, we thought we'd try the line for It's A Small World. We had a few delays, but eventually made it there!
Look what we saw inside- erikaisapanda!
and this is totes mine and Nicole's kind- Filipinos.
and so with this Holiday Season, I say...
and
which very roughly translated means this...
but really it means- MERRY CHRISTMAS!
The girls and I are def looking forward to the many adventures we'll share in
We are also hoping for
The gals and I know that many things are not guaranteed in this world. However, we are extremely sure that no matter what- we will all LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER!
Life is GRAND!
Super Panda
We started off at California Adventure
It's a Bug's Life!
Our weird hologram pic
Erika- which character are you?
I was Jane from Tarzan. Megan was Belle from Beauty and the Beast, Nicole was Dot from A Bug's Life, and Emila was Nala from The Lion King!
After California Adventure, we then headed over to Disneyland.
Our first ride was Pirates of the Caribbean and then we were off to Splash Mountain in Critter Country!
Zip A Dee Do Dah, Zip A Dee Yay
After this ride, we then went to the Haunted Mansion where we had fastpasses.
After the Haunted Mansion, we then tried our luck at Indiana Jones... too long of a wait so we didn't get on it. So we ventured over to Tomorrowland and went on the Finding Nemo ride. After that, we went to Space Mountain.
After the ride, guess who we found!
After seeing Minnie and Mickey, we thought we'd try the line for It's A Small World. We had a few delays, but eventually made it there!
Look what we saw inside- erikaisapanda!
and this is totes mine and Nicole's kind- Filipinos.
and so with this Holiday Season, I say...
and
which very roughly translated means this...
but really it means- MERRY CHRISTMAS!
The girls and I are def looking forward to the many adventures we'll share in
We are also hoping for
The gals and I know that many things are not guaranteed in this world. However, we are extremely sure that no matter what- we will all LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER!
Life is GRAND!
Super Panda
