Tuesday, November 24, 2009

LOST

At times, I feel completely directionless.
This is one of those times.
Not quite sure why, or how, but I am finding that this is my current state.
Not event the hello kitty band- aid on my thumb is making me happy.

Perhaps I feel sad because my dad's birthday is right around the corner, and I can't help but miss him during this time.
Perhaps its the holidays that are right around the corner.
Or perhaps, it's because at 27, I feel I am no closer to having a classroom of my own, than I did back in August.

I feel a mess.
I feel like I failed.
And that is the worst feeling of all.
Because I feel as I've let myself down. That I deserve so much better.
That my life is stagnant and not going anywhere.
That I don't even know how to dream anywhere because they seem to no longer be coming true.

And I need to find my way back.
Cause I simply do not like my current state of affairs.
So, dear God, if you're out there, please help me find my way.
I'm a weary traveler looking for some comfort.

Life is GRAND- just challenging at times.
Super Panda