Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Random Updates

*Still not 100% I'm ready for the day to be over so I can go home and rest. I hate taking days off and missing work. So weird, I know. I just hate relying on others to do my work that I am responsible for.

*Omaha Steaks. I received a huge box in the mail from a talent of mine as a late birthday gift. The hubby and I cannot wait to try them. We'll probably be eating them for quite a while though since we got quite a bit.

*I hate the waiting period. We are now in the waiting phase of something that could totally change our lives... ok, more specifically, Milo's. Ok, wait. Mine too.
I hate waiting! I am so impatient.

Life is GRAND!
Super Panda

Monday, October 27, 2008

Being sick sucks!

About once a year or so, my body decides to just kinda give up on me... it's run down, tired, and achy. This happens to be that time of year.
I am unfortunately sick... and going home from work in a bit to rest.

Life is GRAND- except I totally don't like being sick!
Super Panda

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Cabo- here we come!

Since the end of fire season is almost near, the hubby gave me an awesome gift.
A trip to Cabo! We leave the day after Thanksgiving and return the following week- the 2nd. A short trip, but it will be fun! I cannot wait!
YAY!

Life is GRAND!
Super Panda

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

A Life Like No Other...

Today, someone asked me how I feel about my husband being a firefighter.
I struggled to hold all emotion back when I said that "I am proud of him."
I am proud because my husband has chosen such a selfless profession. I am proud because not a lot of people can withstand the pressure and stress that he faces when there's a fire. I am proud simply because he's worked hard for his career, and he loves every aspect of it. Most importantly, I am proud because his career has shaped the man he is today- responsible, hard working, and self assured. I am his biggest fan.

This question prompted another response from me... I said that I don't know another life other than this. I've never really thought about it until I was asked this question, but really, I don't remember a time when my husband wasn't working to become a firefighter. He started off as an EMT for AMR, and his shift schedule has always been erratic. Weekends weren't spent at home, neither were holidays. This has simply become the norm for us. He's been with the Forest service for a few years now, and he's also worked as a firefighter for Fillmore for a couple years, so I know and understand how his schedule is. He has committed himself to this kind of life. When we got married, I knew that I was committing myself to this kind of life as well. I am al for him following his dreams, and we're both taking the steps to making them happen.

Life is GRAND!
Super Panda

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

The Fireman's Wife



"I am jealous of the women. Not just the ones whose husbands come home each night, but also the ones who love my husband simply for what he does, the ones who see him only as a knight in shining armor, forgetting that he has habits and weaknesses that make him just a regular guy. I am fearful of their idol worship competing with the level of love and appreciation I show him after becoming accustomed to what he does. He's still our knight in shining armor, but I'm the one who dusts his pedestal."

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Happy 13th Birthday Jakob!

Today, my nephew turns 13 :) Hooray!

Today, Thursday...

is one of those days where I'm ready to admit defeat and just curl up in bed.

Life is GRAND- although a bit disappointing at times!
Super Panda

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Cupcakes, anyone?

My husband sure knows the way to my heart...
He knows that it comes in a little turquoise box.

The note reads:

"Happy Birthday Cupcake"
Love, Milo, Jamba, Cash

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

What a windy, blustery day!!

Due to the Santa Ana winds, we have been up here at my in-laws/ office since yesterday morning. The Sesnon fire (which started in Porter Rance) is very close to us, and the canyons right next to us have been evacuated. Actually, so were we yesterday, but we didn't leave. WE've had firetrucks lined up on the street, and even one on the driveway.
The hubby came home last night, picked up the dogs, and was able to come in because he had a fire ID, and his Bear Divide uniform. We spent the night at my in- laws' house. This morning, we woke up extremely early (after just sleeping a few hours), to see the hubby off to work... he's back on the Marek Fire. We have been feeding the firemen parked outside non- stop. I hope this all ends soon.
It's barely 11 AM and I am exhausted! I hope the hubby and all the other men and women out there are safe. Please say a prayer for them.

Life is GRAND!
Super Panda

Monday, October 13, 2008

Monday, the 13th

Today...

I realized that my husband's job is much bigger than the life he and I have built together. Frankly, I'm not sure if that makes sense to anyone.
It's just that since he got called out to a fire Sunday morning- at 3 AM, I was pretty sad and bothered that there was a huge possibility he wouldn't be around for my birthday. It got even worse, as my family kept on asking me what we were doing to celebrate. The husband came home last night because they thought the fire (Marek Fire), was contained. However, this morning, it was a whole other story.

While watching the fire on the news, it suddenly dawned on me, that while my birthday is an important event in my life, and the life of those near and dear to me, it simply reamins just that. There's so much more going on around us, and since my husband works such a community oriented job, our home life then becomes secondary to the needs of the community.

I have been a fireman's wife for a little over 3 years now, and this just dawned on me. Odd I know, but for us, it has always worked out that he's been home for birthdays. He hasn't been around for holidays, but birthdays and anniversaries he's been there- at least until this year, when he's missed both. And it wasn't until this morning that I realized, that this is okay. I am okay. After all, there are far bigger things that my husband and I are a part of. We can always celebrate another day.

Life is GRAND!
Super Panda

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Birthday Adventures of Super Panda

Saturday, October 12th started out like most Saturdays- weights and spinning at the gym, followed by a few errands.
However, there was also a magnificent plan for the afternoon- Debbie was hosting a birthday party for me! What ensued was a fun filled ladies' event (that is, until Milo stopped by). Thank you Debbie for throwing such a lovely bash! To my gals- y'all know I've got nothing but love for you. You all enrich my life in so many ways. I am forever grateful that I have you all in my life.

Here are a few pics from Saturday... the afternoon plans included a game of croquet.
Andrea, Erika, Nicole, Megan

Andrea, Emila, and Andrea waiting for their turn

Debbie was in last place!

Megs!

Nik and Erika

My turn!

These girls were in it to win it!

Nik won- by default. The default being that we all quit.

After a friendly game of croquet, it was time for dinner. Debbie prepared drunken shrimp (with 3 different dipping sauces), jasmine rice (lemon and basil flavored), along with cous cous, a cucumber salad, all topped off with a lovely toast, Dom Perignon style. Before the hubby arrived to join in on the festivities, I gave the gals my thank you gift- for making all my days brighter, and my life happier. I gave them personalized notes, with framed pictures, and a take home truffle treat.
Then it was my turn to open gifts! My gals totally know the way to my heart... Andrea got me a lovely bracelet- engraved with my name, and the word COURAGE. Totally fitting for this year!
Here I am opening Emila's gift...

Oh no, she didn't!

Totally loving the Sprinkles Cupcakes Red Velvet mix. I cannot wait to make it- perhaps on my new cakelet pan?

Here I am making out with one of Nik's gifts- who totally surprised me with all the beautiful and wonderful things she gave.

After the gifts, it was time for some cake.

Make a wish!

Yummy red velvet!

To cap off the night, group pictures!
Megan, Erika, Emila, Nicole, Andrea and Debbie

Meg, Nik, and me!

Meg, Nik, Emila and me

Me with the love of my life...


All this, and my birthday isn't even until Tuesday, the 14th!
Thanks to everyone who has helped me celebrate my birthday!

Life is GRAND!
Super Panda

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Reflections

As I turn 26 this year, I've come to a few realizations...

- That I no longer am a child. I definitely feel more grown up as I turn 26. I feel like this is such a defining moment for me, and I really think that it's all because I've lost a parent.

- This year has definitely been an insane year for me. Nothing will ever be the same-for the years to come. I have been living with such grief, that it has been hard to function at times. This birthday is definitely a bittersweet moment.

- I actually am okay with my birthday this year... I've had some sort of acceptance/ peace with it. I'm sure it also has to do with my dad passing- that this is inevitable, and I can't resist change.

- The future shines brightly ahead. That I feel in my heart and just know.
I am grateful for this.

Life is GRAND!
Super Panda

Monday, October 6, 2008

Mr. March 2009

Whenever the hubby's at a fire, he takes tons of pictures. He submitted a few pictures for consideration for a 2009 calendar. This picture won and is now featured in a 2009 Wildland firefighter calendar.

Order yours today from The Supply Cache.

Weekend Update

Saturday:

Tea party at Meg's mom's house. Such a great time with the ladies.
Thank you Meg and Jan for hosting. Such good food and great company- what more could you ask for? Definitely an awesome way to kick off birthday month. Pictures to come later.

After tea, Megan and I saw Fireproof. The movie was cheesy, and the acting was terrible, but it had a great message.

Sunday:
Church, then hung out with the fam- doing some light shopping. HA!
After that, it was off to celebrate Hunter's 21st birthday. Saw Flash of Genius and ate at Jar.

All in all, a great weekend!
I cannot wait til this week is over, because the hubby would be home!!

Life is GRAND!
Super Panda

Friday, October 3, 2008

Friday, Fun Day!

So this morning, I woke up with the sharpest pain in my stomach. It was before the sun even rose, and it was horrible! I thought for sure I would be headed to the hospital. But, long story short, no hospital, and here I am sitting at work, ready for the weekend. I'm exhausted though. It's been a long, tough, busy week.

And so I'll end the work week with this... every night, I write down 5 things I'm grateful for. Today, I will share a few of those things...

I AM GRATEFUL FOR

*girlfriends
*my life of abundance
*the week that is almost over, and the one ahead

Life is GRAND!
Super Panda

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Better In Time

Perhaps this song wasn't written for circumstances like mine. However, I find that this song speaks volumes to me, especially since I heard it on my way home from therapy last night. It definitely was a sign of hope for me... that I will get better in time, and the pain I feel regarding my dad won't be as bad with time.

Better In Time- Leona Lewis

It's been the longest winter without you
I didn't know where to turn to
See somehow i can't forget you
After all that we've been through

Going
Coming
Thought i heard a knock(Whose there, Noone?)
Thinking that (I deserve it)
Now i have realised
that i really didn't knooOooOw

If you didn't notice
You mean everything (quickly I'm learning)
To love again (all i know is)
I'm be oooOook

Thought i couldn't live without you
It's going to hurt when it heals too
Oh yeaah (It'll All get better in time)
Even though i really love you
I'm gonna smile because i deserve too
Oooh(It'll all get better in time)

I couldn't turn on the TV
Without something that would remind me
Was it all that easy?
To just put us out your feeling

If i'm dreamin
Don't want to let it (hurt my feelings)
But that's the past (i believe it)
And i know that, time will heal it

If you didn't notice
Well you mean everything (quickly i'm learning)
Oooh turn up again (All i know is)
I'm be ok

Thought i couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
Oooh yeah(It'll all get better in time)
Even though i really love you
I'm gonna smile because i deserve too oooooh(It'll all get better in time)

Since there's no more you and me (No more you and me)
This time i let you go so i can be free
And Live my life how it should be(No No No No No No)
No matter how hard it is
I will be fine without you
Yes i Will

Thought i couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
Oooh(It'll all get better in time)
Even though i really loved you
I'm gonna smile cos i deserve too yes i do(It'll all get better in time)

Life is GRAND!
Super Panda