Today's Conditions

Cloudy but with a little bit of sunshine.
Yes, I'm happy to report that I'm feeling slightly better.
Not a whole lot, but better at least, which is some sign of improvement.

Yesterday while at therapy, my therapist brought up the fact that it's only been a week since I last saw her. Only a week since my life was turned upside down.
And this was a defining moment for me. See, somehow in my head, it felt like it had been longer than a week. It was great having someone else put things in perspective. It really made me feel like I had accomplished a lot more than I was giving myself credit for- because in a week I have:

*figured out what I DON'T want to do. This was my starting point.
*figured out something else I could do/ want to do.
*weighed out my options- with the hubby.
*spoken with others and continue to verbalize my concerns about the situation. I'm def not hiding any emotions.
*done a few informational/ informal interviews- mainly talking to friends who are teachers.
*researched and spoken with a counselor at the University of Phoenix. 3 hours, and 3 phone calls later, I think I have a much better idea as to what I'm going to do with my life.
*spread the word that I am looking for a teaching job, that I am in need of volunteer hours for my masters/ credentials program (240 hours to be exact and it has to involve kids).
*bought myself a review book for the CBEST.
*have visualized and masterminded a new job, and a future that shines brightly.
*a solid resume, although it needs just a bit of fine tuning.
*gotten to know myself- my strength, courage and determination. I am seeing my determination in action.
*reconciled myself somewhat (I'm still working on this!)with the facts that as a teacher, I will be making a lot less than I'm used to, and would have to depend on my husband a little bit more. That I will be making a lot less than a lot of my friends, because essentially I am starting again at the bottom of the ladder.

I have barely given myself time to mourn. Although I did have a few moments in between doing all this where I really indulged and threw myself a pity party.

Today, though, at this moment, I can honestly say I feel some sort of peace.
Perhaps I'm coming to terms that this is what IS now.
That my life is changing and all I can do is embrace the change, the beautiful chaos.
Because, yes, although this whole thing has shaken my entire being, I am being propelled to something far greater.

Although sometimes, I still wish someone would just come and tell me that all is taken care of, and I no longer have to worry. That it will all get easier soon.
That it will all be okay.

So, tomorrow, I may feel completely different. The fear, loneliness and anxiety might come back. However, for today, for right now, I am simply grateful.
Grateful that I can somewhat see the light at the end of the tunnel.
And really, that makes all the difference :)

Life is GRAND!
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A Compliment for Today

I've had a few concerns about becoming a teacher.
Mainly that I won't be good at it.

However, today, while at boxing, one of the kids I train with (who's in high school) actually told me that it would "be cool if I was his teacher." He said I'd be a cool teacher.

And that was a great affirmation. Especially during these tough times.

Life is GRAND!
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The days of the week

Everyday...

I do just a little bit, in the hopes that the Universe will meet me half way.
Ok, that's a lie.
It's become my second job to look for a teaching job. But really in the hopes that the Universe will provide.
I would LOVE a teaching job at a private school that will allow me to teach with just my Bachelor's while I work on my credentials.

Everyday...
I struggle- with the emotions, the doubts, the sadness that lingers from last week's events.
Again, words have been said. And they have left ginormous scars.

Everyday...
I panic. Just a little bit. Ok, a little bit more than a little bit.
I need a teaching job for the coming school year.
That means by August or September, preferrably sooner because I can't be in the land of the unknown and uncertainty for that much longer. I really just don't belong here. Plus, I really can't see myself doing what I'm doing now for another year.
However, I am learning- to trust. That all will work out well.
And I know they will. God loves me that much.

Everyday...
I ask for prayers to help keep me going through this difficult time.
Prayers that I find a new job. Prayers that things get easier someday soon.
Prayers that it will all come out roses in the end.

Everyday...
I am grateful. I am grateful that I have a loving husband who is encouraging me in this new direction, because not only does it affect my life, but his as well.
I am grateful that I have a loving family who supports me in the decisions that I have had to make in just a short amount of time. Grateful that my mom calls me everyday to see how I'm doing because she knows I'm struggling. Mother's Instinct, I'm guessing. I am grateful that I have such wonderful friends who are my biggest cheerleaders. I am grateful for everyone that has been my saving grace and who continue to be. I love you all, and your words and actions mean so much. Thank you.

And lastly, I'm sorry.
I know I've been a downer lately. I've been the kind of person who really hasn't been that much fun to be around. All I've done is talk about my misery, my fears, my concerns. For all of that, I apologize.
I promise it won't always be like this. I promise that deep down, the cheerful me that you're all used to is there. I promise- because I have to believe in that too.

Things will get better in time. So, hang in there with me.

Life is GRAND!
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E X H A U S T E D

Mentally. Physically. Emotionally.

Most def the latter one.

My neck hurts, which is a sign of tension for me.
All this is not surprising.
I really want to just sit here and cry.
Or be at home and cry.
Or curl on my couch and cry.
Anywhere but here.

I am falling apart today.
Just when I thought I was having a great day this morning.
And just when I thought I was doing great yesterday.
But here I am today. Feeling pretty miserable.

I'm worried because I'm scared of a career change.
I'm worried because I have to go back to school.
I'm worried because I will now have to take on a student loan.

Clearly, I am having problems seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.

UGH! has become an all encompassing statement from me. UGH!

Life is GRAND- although right now, it's way too hard to see this!
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Today's Thoughts

I emailed this to my dear friend, E.
Somehow it seemed fitting to be on my blog as well.

So, the plan as of late has really been to get out of the biz.

I am heavily leaning towards a teaching career (elementary or junior high). The paper chase is really something that I no longer enjoy, and I def think my focus has changed to of course starting a family and doing what would be best for my future family career wise.

The days of working longer than 8 hours, more than 40 hours a week, and often times giving up my evenings are really no longer appealing to me.

I think that perhaps her saying that I've been stagnant is a sign. Something that I didn't see before. I do know that I've changed a lot since my dad died, and I think this career that I have now is just one of the casualties of change. I don't know.

I'm scared. I'm excited. I'm a mixture of emotions.

My starting point off is really that now I know what I don't want to do.

I still believe that all this has been a blessing. I specificlaly remember driving into work last Tuesday saying out loud "I believe the world is plotting to do me good today. I can't wait to see what it is." And that's when things spiraled out of control.

So right now, as fearful as I am, I am enjoying the ride...

HA! At least until I feel self pity again, which rears its ugly head once every few minutes/ hours. I think really my issue is just to learn how to separate myself from my job at the moment, since it has defined me for so long.

Life is GRAND!
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My Journey to Finding Me

Needless to say, the events of last week rocked me to my core- and that is saying the least. I've said it before, and I will say it again, life, after the dust settles will no longer be the same. Too many hurtful words have been said, and of course, the wounds now run deep.
Last week, and all through the weekend, I was desperately trying to pull myself out of the funk that set in. I prayed and prayed and asked for signs that all will be well. And I did receive. I received numerous signs. Yet, I still had my doubts, mainly because my whole life was just turned upside down.
The biggest revelation I had was at church on Saturday night. The bishop said (in so many words) "To find out who you really are."
And what I'm realizing is this...
*That the me before, the younger me, is totally different from the woman I am becoming. That the things I valued then are totally different from the things I value now.
And it's scary. Scary because I am changing right before my very own eyes.
The glitz and glamour of what I do for a living, no longer appeal to me. It simply is not me anymore. I am looking for something far simpler. Definitely something a lot less complicated.
Which has lead me to this...
I am on the cusp of going back to school. A master's degree as well as my teaching credentials are waiting for me.
But even though I have my heart set on this, I still feel a tug. A pull from the life I used to live. Mainly because that life was easy (except for a few minor set backs like the one from last week). That life had job security, steady income, and totally provided me with a way more than comfortable lifestyle.

So the question becomes... Is the money worth compromising my happiness?
Of course, the obvious answer is NO. And most days, the answer is NO.
But sometimes, I wonder just how much I'm giving up. And really, will it be all worth it?

My friend Mikey reminded me of this today- from the one line he remembers from the whole book (Of Mice and Men)...
"The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry."

And that's exactly what's happened to me. Total chaos.
But yet, there's excitement brewing in the air.

Changes are a-comin'!

Life is GRAND!
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Beaten Down

is how I feel today.
Yesterday, I felt somewhat empowered. Somewhat uplifted. Somewhat optimistic.
Today, I feel so broken.

I just feel like my life's a mess.
And while everyone has been teling me that it's not me that's the problem, I can't help but feel that perhaps somehow, in someway, I brought this on myself.
The closest comparison that I have been able to come up with has really been to compare it to the dynamics of an abusive relationship. The abuser perpetually beats down the abusee, and the abusee just becomes too despondent to leave, or to change the situation. It just becomes a way of life. And it has been for the past 4 years.
If I followed her rules and listened, I didn't get hurt, but as soon I stepped out of line, I was put back in place.

When the hubby and I were first married, she endlessly blamed me, yelled, and hurled a numerous amount of insulting tirades my way. She made me feel uncomfortable and unwelcomed in her house, understandably enough because it is her domain. My friend E once said, "There can only be one queen in the house."
When we were finally able to afford our own place, things got a little better because then, we were no longer under her roof. However, I was still under her control because I worked for her. I put up with it, I played the game. I did what she wanted and it was smooth sailing. I needed to because the hubby was pursuing his dream of becoming an LA City Firefighter, and I was the one supporting our family.
I thought we had gotten past our issues, my MIL and I. Yes, we've had a few minor flare ups, which all have ended with me swallowing my pride and apologizing even if I wasn't at fault.

However, this last time, I think was the straw that broke the camel's back.

She didn't like that I asserted our right to our own life. She didn't like that I openly planned something without her. I marched to the beat of a different drummer, and stepped out of line. I broke free. And that was just not acceptable to her.

So she punished me. She spread rumors and lies about me. She made me look like a horrible, evil woman, when really, all I wanted was to provide my husband, her son, with the best birthday possible.
And now, she is cold and mean to me. All because she didn't get her way, like she's had for the past few years. When she enters the room, you can feel the tension as it permeates every inch of the office. She talks to me in a cool, harsh tone, while she wamrly and lovingly speaks to everyone else. I have been banished.

And now, here I am. I have fallen out of grace.
Her grace. And it brings forth a mixture of emotions.
Sadness, anger, guilt, shame, excitement, helplessness.

The old me, the younger me, would have cried and asked for forgiveness. Grovelled at her feet.
The new me, older and a bit wiser me, has a lot more self- respect, and self worth, that I no longer want to be under her control.
She can say that this is all I know how to do. She can say that this is all I can do.
She can say that she has more integrity than I do. That I don't know how to be a friend. That I'm rude and mean spirited. She can say that I'm just after her money.
She can say that she hopes when I have kids, they treat me poorly. She can say I sabotaged her and her business. That I'm abrasive, disrespectful, and rude. She can say that I never invite her for coffee, or pick up her weekend phone calls, or that we never invite her over. She can say all these things, and she has.
But I'm stronger now. Stronger willed, and stronger in spirit.

I may cry. I may feel helpless. I may have my days where I am so overwhelmed with self pity that I just want to hide under a rock. But I also do know that I will make it. That I am worth more than the way she treats me. That I love my husband and he loves me too. I know that I took the high road. I know that I sat there and agreed with everything she said, and said "I'm sorry you feel that way about me."
That I acted like an adult. I swallowed it and ate it, even if I wasn't at fault.
I know I did all that. I know that I didn't need to insult someone to compensate for what may be lacking. I know that I'm a better person than what I've been given credit for.

I don't deserve this.
Yet, here I am...

Life is GRAND!
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Rock Bottom

The series of events that have transpired within the past few days have left me so discombobulated.
I am currently a mixture of emotions, but one that sticks out the most is helpless.
I feel as if I have

f
a
l
l
e
n

from Grace. Who's grace, I don't quite know yet. But somehow, someway, I have.
All of a sudden, with no warnings.
And here I am. In a state of _________ (insert here).

I am in a constant battle between positive and negative.
Positive and grateful that I still have a job. Negative because I know I need to get out. I just have nowhere to go. Plus, I need the money, especially now that we have a house.

I am asking for prayers.
A prayer to give me strength through this difficult time.
A prayer that I find a new job.
A prayer that I'm still able to hold my head up high through all this.
A prayer. Any prayer will do.

As night comes, I feel my melancholy creep in.
It's not a good feeling as the hubby is not home. I am alone in my own company, wallowing in self- pity.
I know that there are brighter days to come, and that I should look at this as an opportunity, rather than a deterrent.

Life as I once knew it is basically no longer.
My world has been rocked, and not in a great way.
Changes are a- coming! And they can only be for the better.
I know that we have to taste the bitter to know the sweet.
And damn, when it's bitter tasting, it's really horrible.

Life is GRAND!
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When Push Comes to Shove

I get moving.

Checklist:

*A job: check
*A comfortable lifestyle: check
*A job that doesn't involve my mother-in-law in anyway: PRICELESS.

Yes, I'm on the hunt.
I cannot do this anymore.
Some may not agree, but I say to you, You don't know what it's like to be in my shoes.
However, I am resilient. I will be on top again.

Life is GRAND!
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Because of today's events...

I feel...

*lost
*sad
*unsure
*anxious
but really lost.

Thanks to my girlfriends who have listened to me all day. Thanks for your two cents.
Thanks for feeling sorry for me, but I assure you, it doesn't compare to the pity party I am currently throwing myself.
I just wish I wasn't in this situation. I was definitely caught off guard.
I really just wanted to do something nice for my husband. That was it.
Then all this happened.
UGH!

Life is GRAND- just frustrating at tmes.
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No Matter How You Slice It

I always end up being the bad person.

Today was a fun day. It was supposed to be exciting. Today was the hubby's surprise birthday.

I tell the MIL to come early. The earlier the better.
She then tells me it depends on when I get out of work.
As a joke, and believe me when I say that I said this in a jovial tone, I said "Otherwise you're not allowed. She says it's my son's birthday. I can come."
Then she pulls a Linda Blair from the Exorcist, turns her head around and says "You stop being mean to me."
I then defended myself and said "I'm not. I was just teasing. You tease me all the time." (and she does. she says mean things)
Then I followed her and said, "I'm really sorry to offend you. I didn't mean to."
She follows that up with "You stay away from me, or I'll blow up at you."

Life is GRAND!
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Raging Bitch No More!

This week is promising to be a better week, even though I only got 3 hours of sleep last night. The hormones are under control. Period week, and the week before can suck it!

Anyhow, that's the latest update.

Life is GRAND!
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Helicopter In- laws

I def have a pair.
They are up for grabs. Any takers? I'm giving them away for free!
Husband NOT included.

I believe that at the age of 26, almost 27, that the hubby and I are entitled to our own lives.
That means that when we want to have people over (for any occasion) that we are entitled to do so.
We own our own house, we work hard for our money, and hence, this is a right we have earned.
This means that at our discretion, we can invite whomever we want, and vice versa.

However, my MIL has a different point of view.
After I have told her TWICE that this event that's happening at our house is for friends only, she still has invited herself.
To stop by. Which doesn't really mean that.

What to do? What to do?
I have prayed, I have cried. I am now just plain angry. The hubby can't help. He's unaware of what's happening since it's a birthday surprise.
I feel so alone in this. I also feel so helpless.
Definitely a bad combination.

Why, oh why, must you rain on my parade?

Life is GRAND- just a little sucky at the moment.
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A Prayer for Two Broken Hearts

A dear friend of ours lost their beloved dog today.
Words cannot even express the pain that I feel for their loss.
Please, please, pray for them during this difficult time.
Trish (of Wildland Firefighter Wives)and her hubby lost their oldest baby today, Sparky.

Rest in peace Sparky. Your mommy and daddy miss you very much. They love you dearly.

Tonight, my world is a little bit sadder, because my dear friends are in pain. Although life is still grand in the big picture, at this moment it is very sad and painful.

For Trish and Jim...
Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed;
for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will
help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right
hand of my righteousness. . . . For I the LORD thy
God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear
not; I will help thee. Isaiah 41:10, 13 King James
Version Bible

With love,
The Cope's

The Weight Debate

It seems that everyone around me seems to just be talking about their weight. Mainly about how they need to lose weight. Great, I get it. You need to lose a few. However, we do not need to be talking about this issue every few minutes or so.
It def ruins my mornings.
You DO NOT need a pat on the back every goddamn day!

Life is GRAND!
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Friday Quickie

A few random updates...

*The hubby's birthday is next Wednesday. He is turning 27. Wow! We're getting old.
We have decided that for our 30th, we will be going to Europe since we both turn 30 the same year.

*Today is Friday. I cannot be more excited for this day! It has been a horrible week at work, and I'm def looking forward to the weekend (plus I have next Wednesday off). It's also supposed to be hot this weekend, which means only one thing- TANNING!
You can find me in our backyard doing nothing but this all weekend.

*Tonight, I have dinner with a few of the girls. I believe reservations were made for 5 adults, 6 babies. I'm the 1 adult without a baby, and you know what? This doesn't even make me wish I had one.

And now, a quick shout out to a few people who make my life SUPER FAB!

*The hubby. I miss you when you're not home, but also enjoy it cause I get the whole bed to myself.

*The boys, Jamba and Cash (I included them because they're my babies).

*My family. Thank you for feeding me when the hubby's not home, and providing me with lots of fun company.

*The Brit. She's my friend, she's my neighbor, she's my gym buddy- or workout buddy in general. She also lets me borrow her baby (he's soo good btw). She makes me tea, and last night, her hubby made us great steaks. Thank you for keeping me entertained, motivated, and for your company.

*The girls. Thanks for the friendship.

*Maria. You clean my house. You entertain me. You're my friend. Thank you. Especially since you're cleaning my house twice next week.

*Tam, my gardener. Thank you for ignoring the dog poo we don't pick up. Thank you for picking it up.

*Marlene, my personal banker. Thank you for putting up with my numerous calls. You're on it like white on rice.

And yes, there are many more people that make my life great. This was just a quick run down...

Life is GRAND!
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Boiling Point

ANNOYANCE LEVEL= 9

It's one of those days.
I'm so close to losing it.
Watch out if you call me. Seriously.
You might just be the one to get me to 10.
Don't say I didn't warn you.

Needless to say today hasn't been my day.
From a talent who's dicking us around, to an agent who's on my dick... it's just one too many dicks for me today.
Sometimes, I really dislike my job. Today's one of those days.

Life is GRAND- ugh, except when it's soo hard to get through the day!
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Today's Words of Wisdom

"Women wish to be loved not because they are pretty,
or good, or well bred, or graceful, or intelligent,
but because they are themselves."
Henri Frederic Amiel Swiss Philosopher

Life is GRAND!
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Postsecret

I'm avid reader of Postsecret.

Here's a fave from Sunday's secrets.


Life is GRAND!
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The Day After

I'm exhausted! I had a 3 day weekend- I spent none of it sleeping in. UGH!
Now I'm back at work. Good thing I get off early today for a doctor's appt.
Anyway, nothing new or amusing today.

Life is GRAND!
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Spring is in the air!

Which means something new is about to happen around here.
Stay tuned! I'm not one for surprises, nor am I one for keeping my mouth shut, but I thought I'd try it just this once.
Let's see how long I can hold it for.

*OK- and NO, we are not preggers, which means we are not having a baby*

On another note, had a great day at the mall today. I def can do damage at that place, and my activities today totes proved that.
I SOOO deserved it. Thanks to my two shopping buddies, Priscilla Miscilla, and Little Miss A.

Please refer to a previous post from a few days ago when I reiterate this...

One of the reasons I like the hubby is...

-Because no matter how much I shop and how much money I spend you never get really mad (and we both know I have expensive taste).

Even though nothing that cost too much was purchased today, a lot of little things were that add up to one big amount. I have reached my shopping quota for the month, and damn, it's not even mid month yet. Yikes!

Life is GRAND!
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Thursday is the new Friday!

Yes, you read that right! Thursday is the new Friday.
I am off tomorrow. Yippee!
I plan to sleep in, go to my doctor's appt. and hang out with Priscilla Miscilla.

Life is GRAND!
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Note to self...

Do not eat sugar free pudding, or any pudding for that matter.
You'll just feel worse after.

(this was written after said pudding induced a horrible headache).

Life is GRAND- even if you feel horrible after eating pudding!
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Random conversation between N & I

N:i'm a bitch
E:HAHAHAHA
N: but a nice one though
E:well, at least you know
N: hhahahaha
E: HA
N: know what... that I'm a bitch??
N: rude!!!
E:yea
E: duh!
N: HAHAHAHAHAHHA
E: that's the most important step
E: I'm a bitch and damn proud of it shit!
N: hahahahahaha
N: like that one magnet... "you say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing"
N: but i'm a really really nice and caring bitch though so what's so wrong with that!?!?
E: HAHAHHAHA
E: well, nothing from my point of view
E: but then again i could so be the wrong person you're asking
E: so watching sex and the city last night so made me want to want a mimosa
N: you're not helping me
N: fine, I'm going to unbitch-ify myself starting immediately
N: yum... mimosa
E: HAHA
N: haha
E: is that possible
E: ??
N: hmm... genius question... are bitches born or created?
N: HAHAHAHAHA
E: i think it's btoh really
N: haha
E: welre born bitches, and then we're made better by nature
E: HA
N: love your theory Mrs. Cope
N: oops. BernaRdino-Cope
E: well, anytime, my dear, anytime.
E: HA

my new BFF

This past weekend, the hubby and I got a pair of these...


They're fab! They recline all the way back. My tanning sessions began yesterday.
We lounged on them- ALL DAY! Mostly me, because he was studying for his academy midterm.

Life is GRAND!
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I Like You

This is a book that's in print. Shauna is making me a custom one for the hubby. Here's her shop: Little Shop of Shavs


Here's my list:

I Like You…

•Because you’re my bestest friend in the whole wide world.

•Because you’ve given me the greatest gift- your love.

•Because you’re a wonderful daddy to our boys, Jamba and Cash.

•Because you smell and feel like home.

•Because you put up with my quirks, my grumpiness, my silliness, and you love me just the way I am.

•Because you always try to make me happy.

•Because you pursued your dream of becoming an LA City Firefighter.

•Because no matter how much I shop and how much money I spend you never get really mad (and we both know I have expensive taste).

•Because you support my dreams.

•Because you make up your own songs and sing around the house all the time.

•Because you cook me my favorite kind of eggs when I ask.

•Because we’ve created a beautiful life together. We have been incredibly blessed, but we both know that the best is yet to come!

•Because my life is so much better with you in it!

•Because you always make sure I’m happy.

•Because we make a great team, you and I.

•Because you’ve seen me at my worst, and loved me anyway.

•Because there’s not one day that goes by that I don’t think about how lucky I am to be with you. For that, I am extremely grateful.

•Because you let me have 2 closets and the bigger study in our new house.

Life is GRAND!
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Friday, Fun Day (2nd edition)

So I have been researching places for my mother's 75th birthday extravaganza.
In doing so, I've been speaking to a ton of people.
Here's one conversation that took place, it's mostly one- sided.

Lady (who's overly excited): "Ooh you're planning a birthday party. How fun are you?"

Me: Complete silence
However, in my head... I really just wanted to say "Lady, you have no idea."

Whilst this may not be funny to anyone else, it was a fucking riot in my head!

Life is GRAND!
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What are we, in high school?

House Party.
Yep, a few people have asked me when our house party is.
Umm... excuse me? Do I look like the house party type to you?
What part of my well manicured (and pedicured), and well groomed self screams house party? Yes, I might be wild and crazy, but def not that kind of wild and crazy. I am deeply perturbed by this. Not to mention the anxiety it gives me when someone mentions house party because it totally just sounds, well, ghetto and so I <3 the
80's, or the 90's. And really, I'm not up for drunks in my beautiful house.
And before anyone goes on thinking that I'm a snob.
I'm def not. I just like to think that those wild and crazy party days are days of the past, and really, well, there's no sense in bringing it back to the present.

So please, let's stick with terms like housewarming, or a celebration, if you will. Because certainly, the term house party guarantees you will not get an invite.
Drunk firefighters on my lawn= def not cute!

Life is GRAND!
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It has TOTES come to my attention

that I need to be blonde again. STAT!
I miss my summer hair.
I need to discuss with the hubby upon his return tomorrow.

Life is GRAND!
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Something is OH so wrong!

Not with me, but with the fucktard who stole mine and the hubby's account number and bought himself a fucking camera. A camera- for fuck's sake!

Yes, I should have forewarned- MANY, and I mean MANY f bombs will be dropped in this post.

Ok, so this fucktard named James Reynolds (and I have no fucking clue who he is) decided to buy a camera with our account. Long story short, I saw it through online banking, reported it, and have filed a fraud claim with my bank and paypal.
This dumbdfuck is now having me jump through hoops to fix this shit!
Lovely.

So, my afternoon has consisted of numerous phonecalls to my bank and to paypal. That will then be followed by a trip to the bank to close this account and to open a new one.
All to get my $358.89 back.

I WILL SUCCEED!

Life sure is GRAND!
Super Panda

A Funny Thing Happened

at the doctor's office...

Today, I had my annual physical. The nurses had a hell of a time trying to draw blood from me, particularly because I'm not very vein-y. Please don't confuse that with VAIN because, that I am very much so.
Anyhow, a couple of different nurses came and tried. They were all very frustrated with me, so I thought I'd lighten up the atmosphere, by telling a joke.

ME: "So I guess I won't be doing heroine since apparently I'd be really bad at it."

NURSE 1: "No, you shouldn't"
NURSE 2 just stares at me with blank eyes.

My joke totally blew them away.
Apparently, it was only funny to me.

Life is GRAND!
Super Panda

UGH! Highly Annoyed!

Annoyance level= 8

So I have been pulled off certain foods by my homeopathic doc for a couple of weeks now. No seafood, wheat, flour. This past Monday, he pulls me off sugar. Needless to say I've become a raging bitch because of this.
Today, when I met my boxing coach, he tells me to lay off the meat.

Geez, can my diet get any worse??

I think the thing that makes this even more ridiculous to me is that I hate veggies.

So, UGH!

On the bright side, the week is almost over.
I def cannot wait for the weekend!

Life is GRAND!
Super Panda